The following post was written on 11/10/11 before my return flight from Thailand.
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I hate goodbyes. Even when goodbyes are “see you again’s” I still dislike them.
I’m sitting in Chiang Rai’s tiny boring airport surprised the trip is over (all that is left is the horrendous flight back in economy). I am waiting for my 9:30pm flight to Bangkok (which will board at 9:20), get some sleep and up early for my flight back to Oklahoma City. OKC which has apparently endured 2 earthquakes and tornadoes since I have been gone (I hope you’ve gotten it out of your system).
Cat gave me a huge hug on the porch before I left. I told her I was so proud of all she has accomplished over the last year.
Wonderful, my flight is delayed 30 minutes which prolongs this even more.
It’s hard to leave a place you love.
Traveling can bring out your best self and, in some people it brings out your worst. When in transit on my own moving from place to place; I often feel the most aligned within.
I find when I discover the life I worked so hard to create (be it in Ireland or Thailand or even New York) is still accessible it’s so much harder to leave again. It’s strange to revist a place where you had a life and be only a visitor. It’s a blessing and a sadness.
It’s almost a year to the day from when I moved back home to the States from Thailand. Then I had no idea what life would hold, where I would go and how I would feel. Life in America after Thailand felt like this huge, looming, exciting and scary outline just waiting to be filled. I can’t say I have it all filled out and figured out, but that’s OK. Maybe you never do. Perhaps that is what makes life an adventure and worth living. But I do know I am on a great path, am happy, am thriving and working as an advocate, in whatever capacity, is what I am meant to do.
Faith has carried me far on this leap and it will carry me farther still.
“I may not have gone where I intended to go,
but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.”
Douglas Adams